Reclaiming My Voice, Owning My Stories, Deactivating Shame
More on Why I Write
I write about some very personal topics. Sometimes about relationships and dating, non-monogamy; abuse and trauma, misunderstandings and hurt; joy, and tools that have helped me life a happier life. Sometimes I even write fiction.
A big part of my writing is to explore and share my inner world. It helps me sort through my thoughts and feelings, and gives me a chance to freely express my stories.
Some people have told me that they admire my courage, or that my words have helped them or inspired them. Their words touch my heart.
In the past, I’ve had some of my feelings and experiences denied or minimized, as a part of abuse cycles, gaslighting, or mismatched experiences. I’ve had some of my truths shamed and told that I was wrong, that I shouldn’t share my views or experiences. I’ve been told to be silent, to hide myself so I could fit in, to go unnoticed. These words have also touched my heart and my sense of self, in a very different way.
I adopted parts of their shame and took it into my sense of self and self worth — sometimes in such subtle ways that I wasn’t aware it was seeping in.
Shame begets more shame, which cascades into all sorts of destruction.
We tend to hid what we’re ashamed of, afraid that someone else will find out or judge us, or…
Our fear can become the biggest judge, an internal oppressor keeping us from showing our fullest selves.
I write to claim my stories and my feelings as my truth: to express them — including when I’ve been hurt and when I’ve made mistakes. I write to own my stories, to take back some of the power they’ve had over me. They’re mine; I don’t have to hide them.
My writing is a form of empowerment for me. It’s an act of self-love, of self-acceptance.
I grow from my writing, and since my writing. Some of what I’ve published months or even weeks ago might be vastly different from how I feel today — or I may feel the same way in different nuance, gaining insight through time and reflection.
Sharing my writing is an act of courage that isn’t always easy. It’s a practice. I do it for me.
Thank you for reading.
❤
